Becoming a leader often requires one to take risks and to grab the opportunity to lead.
Sometimes this can be in the most mundane areas of life. For you, it might be a leader in the parents’ club or a scout leader or the concession stand coordinator or even just the carpool mom. When I started my work with GIA Wellness, there were key leaders in the company that had been there so long that it is easy to let them overwhelm you. The challenge of knowing when to step in and be the leader, contribute to a call, take the lead on a training call can be intimidating and for many of you the opportunity slips by with regret.
It was Christmas time and I was on break from nursing school, a story for another time. I had a cruse that my family was taking between Christmas and New Years that I was not going to miss. The case was criminal in nature with 5 counts to convict or find innocent. We had heard all the evidence and the judge gave us the case at the end of the day on Thursday. We picked the foreman, someone who had experience in this leadership role and then we went home.
Thus taking the leadership role while on a jury could have been a challenge for me and not one that most women would be comfortable taking for me, we only had Friday to make this happen. Yet, I did not want to “rush to judgment.” The day dawned bright and cold. With almost the first words out of our foreman’s mouth, I knew we wouldn’t get this done in the day.
I went to the bailiff and asked for flip chart paper and tape. As an outstanding trainer who is always prepared, I had markers in my briefcase. After putting the paper on the wall, I wrote the 5 charges and what it took to convict. Then, I took the leadership role.
I walked them through the charges one at a time including the criteria. There was one person who played a great devil’s advocate to ensure that we looked at the evidence and that we really had no reasonable doubt about the verdict. I directed the discussion with questions that caused each juror to examine what s/he truly believed about the testimonies we had heard and the evidence we examined. This is the type of leadership I bring to my tribe. It is not about “telling” what to do, but rather “asking” the questions that allow for discovery and reflection as to what action to take.
When done with deliberation, which is what the process is called, conclusions can be reached in a short amount of time. When everyone is heard and their contributions are taken into consideration in the decision, then collaborative leadership is demonstrated. Bullying people into seeing things your way is a style of leadership and not one to which I subscribe.
Yes, this jury did convict the plaintiff on all counts. We started the process at 9:00 in the morning and were finished at 10:30. The judge had just released everyone until after lunch because he believed we couldn’t get it done before then. Surprise!! We got the gift of time, although we could not leave Martinez. I have to say that the shops definitely benefited from this gift.
The judge did acknowledge our organization and concentration on the decisions to be made. The judge did comment on the leadership that was shown by me. This made my day and validated my leadership style in this situation. It is evident from the “Becoming a Leader” blog last week that each situation and each group requires that the leader assess the needs of the group and be flexible in her style with the group. By the way, I did make the cruise and had great family time with my husband and my daughters in Mexico.
As I started this blog, becoming a leader and taking the leadership role even when you have not been assigned it is risky and scary. Your inner critic can be very active in these situations. Having been where you are, I have made all the mistakes and left leadership opportunities lay on the table. However, when you take advantage of my experience, my ability to teach you leadership skills and give you the support you need, you will grow in confidence as you stand up and lead! You will have the confidence to overcome your fear and hesitancy and to know this is perfect for you.
So, think about when in your life have you had opportunities to lead and did not step into the role and become the leader. When have you kicked yourself for not leading and not getting what you want or need because of it? Take the Ultimate Dare and change your life forever.